A Hopeless Romantic: A Oneshot
Sirius Black hated his family.
The whole lot of them.
And quite frankly, he’d be quite satisfied with forgetting everything that he knew about the Noble and Most Ancient House of Black.
But some things are unforgettable.
And it turned out that the details about the finer areas of life were some of those things.
Try as he might, Sirius could not let go of the knowledge.
And it was quite a surprise to the rest of his students - indeed, it was a surprise to his very friends - when he would occasionally drop the laid-back, reckless, demeanor for a more suave, sophisticated, one.
Because Sirius secretly was quite suave and sophisticated.
Especially when it came to romance.
Try as he might, he couldn’t avoid being a hopeless romantic.
So when James Potter informed him that he was going to ask Lily to the Seventh Year Ball - “Yes, I’m really going to do it this time!” - Sirius immediately told him exactly what to say and where.
“Oh,” James perplexedly said, “I was just going to ask her after Charms.”
“You will do no such thing!” Sirius thundered, “Merlin, do you want her to say yes?”
And so it was on Sirius’ advice that James took Lily out onto the sparkling snow-capped grounds and said precisely the right words.
And it was Sirius who dragged James into an abandoned classroom the next day and gave him a crash-course on ballroom dancing. He treated James like a drill sergeant would treat his cadets.
"Are you planning on stepping onto the floor at all or were you simply going to spend the entire time on my feet?”
And it was Sirius who pulled Lily into the same classroom the next day, giving her precisely the same lesson that he had given James.
And it was Sirius who beamed when he watched his friends gracefully twirl around beneath the spotlight.
But not before Sirius spent an hour sorting through James’ wardrobe to pick out just the right outfit to wear.
“What’s wrong with my dress robes?”
“What’s wrong with your - do you even hear yourself!?”
Indeed, Sirius could be a bit of a drama queen at times.
A bit.
One afternoon, Professor McGonagall had to race down the corridor to intervene when a very irate Sirius screamed, “BECAUSE YOU’RE A BLOODY IDIOT!” to a frustrated James.
"But, Professor,” Sirius argued, as he was dragged to her office, “He was planning on taking Evans to Madam Puddifoot’s!”
And even Professor McGonagall paused and gave James a disapproving glance.
“What’s wrong with Madam Puddifoot’s?” James cried.
“Nothing,” Sirius exclaimed, “If you want a one-night stand! Listen, mate, take her to the French bistro that’s tucked away in the southwestern part of the village. It’s much fancier.”
And Professor McGonagall arched her eyebrows and admitted that that was actually very good advice.
It was Sirius who picked out James’ clothing that night as well. It was Sirius who told James exactly what to order from the menu.
It was Sirius who told James and Lily which china to buy when they bought their first house and Sirius who provided them with the best bottle of wine of the market. It was Sirius who gave them a list of the best places to go on their vacation to France. It was Sirius who accompanied a giddy James to the wizarding jeweler so that he could ensure that James bought a ring with genuine silver and diamonds.
It was Sirius who spent weeks telling James exactly how to propose and Sirius who wiped his eyes and beamed when he recited it perfectly, causing Lily to throw her arms around his neck and whisper, “Yes!”
It was Sirius who planned every aspect of the wedding. And when the time came for the bride and groom to kiss, it was Sirius who had the largest smile in the room, because he knew that his work was done.
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